Rigorous research by genuine accredited neuroscientists like Karl Lashley (1929) and D. O. Hebb (1949) found that you can basically take the wrinkles out of your cerebral cortex with Grandma’s steam iron without materially changing your odds of spelling “embarrassment” correctly. That’s got to mean a whole lot of unused pasture, if you get our drift.

In fact, after trying to get rid of memories with a soldering iron to the cerebral cortex for his whole career, and being unable to get rid of even one really annoying soft-drink jingle, Lashley famously remarked, "the necessary conclusion is that learning just is not possible." On the bright side, this is probably a good thing in terms of our ability to be scanned into giant fax machines and beamed as creatures of pure thought into the limitless future of a techno-rapture just around the corner. (Kurzweil, et al.)